30 week OB check

This morning I had my 30 week check up with my regular OB.  It was the usual - quick and simple. Belly measurement (I didn't even ask what it was - forgot!), heartbeat check for Meagan (140s) and the usual talk.

My OB did tell me today was my last "normal" appointment.  Starting next time at 32 weeks, I'll be brought in weekly to do more thorough exams and non-stress tests to keep a closer watch on Meagan's condition.  Between those appointments and weekly visits to the Perinatologist, I'm going to be quite a busy lady starting at 32 weeks.  The good news is, though, that at least the increased visits mean I am so close to seeing Miss Meagan on the outside.

As we get closer to that point, though, my anxiety does grow.  It's been such a 'far off' end point up until now that I've been able to basically distance myself from it.  But now I start thinking of all the things that will worry me - will I see her.. will I get pictures.. will Brian remember to do everything I normally do... will the girls be ok at home with the two grandmas getting to school and doing homework..etc..   I'm the "strong" one in the family - even after the births of our other daughters, I was always up within 2 hours showering, feeding them, taking their pictures, uploading them to our networking sites..etc.  This time, it's going to be so different.  My OB assured me I will be able to see her - but - I may not be able to touch her if they put her in the incubator directly after the csection.  She did say, though, that we can ask the anesthisiologist to take pictures for us quickly after Meagan is born if we want one with Brian and I in it... so that was slightly reassuring.

All in all, these last 8 or less weeks are going to fly.  The anxiety is tough to stave off.. I've definitely had more random tears flow in the last few days -- but at least I know that it all means the intensity is gearing up towards us finally meeting this little girl and getting her the help she needs and deserves.